Life with Anxiety (courtesy of Brian)

Hey there, it’s A.B.

I know sometimes it can look like lots of other people can appear to have it all together. Let me reassure you that they don’t. That constant monologue of doubt, fear, and shame is something that tons of people from different backgrounds and demographics struggle with every single day. But guess what, it doesn’t have to control you.

First, let’s talk about what anxiety is. Anxiety is our bodies’ natural indication of fear, basically a variation of our fight or flight response. It becomes anxiety when it becomes excessive amounts of worry. There are people who feel anxious sometimes and then there are people who are in a state of constant worry. Living with that anxiety and worry is not just annoying. It’s debilitating.

It impacts the choices we make, the people we meet, and the lives that we live. For someone else, being able to go to a grocery store and get groceries alone or apply for a job seems like an easy and necessary task. When you struggle with anxiety, every thought you have about moving forward is bombarded by 3 more telling you that this is a bad idea, you’re not good enough, or listing out all the obstacles that stand you in your way.

Don’t worry. It’s just “Brian”. Brian is your brain. Your brain’s job is ultimately to keep you safe and stop you from doing things that are attached to any risk. This leads to some very discouraging conversation between you and Brian.

You: Want to start dating?

Brian: Nope. Remember the last time you did that you got your heart broken.

You: Want to go out for that promotion?

Brian: Nope. There are plenty of people who are more qualified to do that job and you’ll just be disappointed if you don’t get it.

You: Want to go to the movies?

Brian: Nope. Everyone will make fun of you because you are at the movies alone. Who does that?

Though we appreciate Brian’s concern, we don’t have to let him control our lives. With new skills and new awareness, we can learn to hear Brian’s rebuttals and move forward in confidence. We can learn to overcome our self-doubt, manage the worry in a way that is productive and validating, and live lives that are aligned with our values and not our fear.

If you want to learn more about anxiety or want to work with us to overcome that fear, consider scheduling an appointment with us.

Reflection: What are some common thoughts that seem to pop up when I think of doing something new? What do I normally do after that thought pops up?

Scripture for thought: “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9